


This Was It

by MrsDeanWinchester87



Category: Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: Boys In Love, DeanCas - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, Heaven, Love Confessions, M/M, Season 15, Season 15 Supernatural, Series Finale, Supernatural - Freeform, casdean - Freeform, death and fluff, death bed love confessions, major character deaths, unicorns are real
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-08
Updated: 2019-08-08
Packaged: 2020-08-13 02:24:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20166610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsDeanWinchester87/pseuds/MrsDeanWinchester87
Summary: They did it. Team Freewill defeated the Entity. It was over...and they had a good run. A really good run. They always knew a hunter's life was a short one. They had made it farther than most hunters ever did.Dean still had things to say... to confess. And he was losing the time to do it. It was now or never****************************************************Written the day we all found out that Supernatural was coming to an end. Written before the season 14 finale! Soooo Chuck is not evil! Kinda hoping Chuck is being possessed by the Empty Entity!This is a take on how I'd like Destiel to become canon and for the series to end...





	This Was It

**Author's Note:**

> So I started writing this the day the boys let us know that the show was coming to an end. I've been slowly working on it and editing it over and over. Life has been busy though. And I had it nearly completed before the Season 14 finale....before Chuck turned out to be evil. So this isn't super compliant....unless Chuck is being possessed by the Entity (fingers crossed).
> 
> This is my first fic, so I'd love some feedback!

This was it. This was the end. He always did want to go out with a bang. But now that it was finally here, he wasn't ready. Sure, he was tired of the Hunter Life, but now that it was coming to an end, he had regrets.

Dean's ears were ringing and his vision was coming in and out of focus; he clenched his eyes shut and shook his head trying to get his bearings. The percussion from the blast threw him, Sammy, and Cas 30 feet, straight into an embankment. But The Entity was gone. It was over.

He looked around taking in his surroundings. To his left he saw Sammy crumpled in a heap. To his right he saw Cas on his side facing away, unmoving. As his range of vision cleared, Dean tried sitting up, only to grunt at the wrenching pain that tore through his torso all the way to his spine. He looked down to see a eight inch, jagged piece of metal protruding from his stomach. He groaned and wrapped his hands around the shard and pulled using all his strength. It wouldn't budge. He tried planting his feet for better leverage… only they didn’t move. He tried again. Nothing. He couldn't feel anything from his legs down. Dean laid his head back on the dirt and closed his eyes. _This wasn't how it was supposed to end. _There were things he still wanted to do and experience._  
_

A cough ripped through the silence.

"Sammy?" Dean snapped his head towards his little brothers direction. "Sammy!" The older man turned on his side, grunting in pain, and dragged himself towards his little brother, being mindful of the metal protruding from his torso. He couldn't seem to move fast enough. 

When he reached Sam, he pulled his little brother by the jacket sleeve, rolling him onto his back. "Sammy?" He tapped his brother's pale cheek. "C'mon man. Wake up." Dean's hands and eyes skimmed over Sam's body cataloging his injuries. He looked down to see Sam's shirt sliced across his stomach; it was deep. Deep enough to see the thin layer of fat and shredded fascia. Sammy was bleeding out. _Shit_. His hands traveled to his brother's neck. There was a pulse, but it was weak. Dean let out a shuddering breath. He kept tapping on his brother's cheek and finally the younger man began to stir at the touch.

"Hey, hey, Sammy. Hey, look at me man. Hey little brother." Sam's eyes began to flutter open.

"Dean?" Sam choked out. Dean's eyes flicked to his blood-stained gums. _No no no_. Sam grunted in pain and he grabbed at his stomach.

"Hey, take it easy, Sammy," he soothed. "You're fine. You're gonna be fine."

"Dean," his brother whispered. Dean's eyes were pricking with tears. He gently pushed Sam's hair away from his blood-soaked forehead. The younger man grabbed onto his brother's sleeve weakly.

"I'm sorry, Sammy. I was supposed to keep you safe," the older man stammered. He swallowed around the huge lump in his throat, blinking as a tear rolled down his cheek and landing in Sam's hair.

"It's… it's okay, Dean," Sam whispered, his breathing becoming more labored. "I'm…" he took a rattling breath. "I'm tired… so tired."

"No, no, no," Dean pleaded, cupping Sam's cheek. "You gotta stay awake for me, okay? We're gonna get help."

"No, Dean. I'm tired… of fighting. I…I wanna go see Jess─ be with Jess." Dean's lower lip began to quiver, and warm tears tracked down his cheeks as a choked sob broke through his lips. "I love you Dean. I'm glad you're my big brother. You always took care of me," he said coughing.

"Hey, hey, hey," Dean pacified, voice quaking. It never got any easier watching his little brother die.

"I'll wait for you," Sam said. The eldest nodded his head, unable to speak past the knot in his throat. "We had a good run," he breathed.

"I'm sorry I brought you back into hunting. You should be married and having little Sammy Juniors running around."

"No, I'm right where I wanna be." Dean nodded, laid back, and pulled Sammy towards him, rolling his younger brother onto his side clutching him to his chest, still careful of the metal that was jutting out from his stomach. His little brother's head lolled onto his shoulder. Dean could feel Sammy's breaths were coming quicker now, shallower with little rasping gasps, as he craddled his baby brother in his arms. The younger man clasped onto his brother's jacket with a white-knuckled grip.

"Okay… that's enough. Just let me die in peace. Bitch," the taller man said whispering the last word. Dean let out a choked laugh at his brother's valiant effort to lighten the mood with his dark humor.

"Hey, that's my line," Dean chuckled wetly. "Jerk." He looked down at his baby brother who had a weak smile gracing his ashen face. Sam gave two more ragged gasp before the smile wilted from his lips, fist slowly unclenching and dropping from Dean's jacket; the last little bit of light faded from his hazel eyes.

"Sammy?" Dean whispered. He gently shook his brother. "Sam?" The levy had finally broke and waves of sorrow flooded his body. He sobbed, repeating his brother's name like a mantra... _Sammy, Sammy, Sammy_. Sam was supposed to outlive him. It wasn't the order of things. Big brothers are supposed to go first. Dean let his head fall back against the dirt as hot tears rolled down his temples; his grasp on his little brother never loosened.

He used his free hand to run his fingers through Sam's hair, raising himself up to bring his lips to rest on the top of his little brother's head. He closed his eyes and shallowly breathed in the fragrance of Sam's hair. He used to do that often when they were younger after his mother had died; when he was left in the motel to take care of Sammy. Dean used to scent his little brother's hair when they were laying on the motel bed after he had bathed Sam. His little brother had always rested back against his chest as he read him a bedtime story. Now, however, his hair smelled of smoke and the metallic scent of blood. He could just barely make out the smell of Sam's shampoo.

"Dean?" came a gravelly voice from his right. Dean whipped his head around.

"Cas?"

"Dean," the angel rasped, slowly pulling himself towards the Winchesters. Dean tried to look Cas over for injuries, but it was difficult while the brunet dragged himself across the embankment. From what little Dean could see, he was bleeding from head to toe, which... happens when you're completely human.

He still wasn't used to seeing Human-Cas. He'd almost forgotten that Cas had cut out his Grace. Going up against The Entity was a suicide mission─ they all knew it. And because of that, Cas had decided to remove his Grace _just in case_. He said he'd rather end up in oblivion than back in The Empty. And in the off chance they beat The Entity and _lived_, he could reinsert his Grace. Worst-case scenario... he disappeared completely from existence. Best case scenario was that he had earned a place back in Heaven. Regardless, he thought it was safest to go in as a human.

Cas laid back on the embankment next to Dean, shoulder to shoulder, trying to catch his breath.

"Sam?" the angel inquired quietly. Dean only shook his head. "I'm sorry," the angel lamented. "I wish I had my Grace. I could've sav─"

"S'okay," Dean murmured, noticing it was getting harder to breathe. Cas turned to fully face him. "The hunter life is always a short one." Dean's eyes traveled down the angel's body, finally taking a full inventory of the angel's injuries─ split forehead, deep lacerations all down his chest and torso, and a deep gash across his thigh. His heavily blood-soaked slacks glinted in the sunlight. Neither of them were going to make it. _Fuck_.

Cas looked at the hunter with earnest eyes.

"I must apologize again for every time I failed you," the angel confessed. "I know I disappointed you each time─"

"Cas. It's okay, I forgive you. I forgive you. I can't stay mad at you. Ever. No matter how hard I try. You're my best friend, and I…" Dean had never been able to say those three little words to Cas. He was scared because it was a love that he'd never experienced before. It was different from how he loved Sammy. The closest he came was with Lisa, but even then he knew it wasn't love. Dean could tell that their lives were drawing to an end. This could be his last moments with the angel and he needed to say it. His breaths were coming shallower and Cas's face was growing paler every second. 

Dean reached down and grasped Cas's hand, lacing his fingers with the angel's. "I love you," he breathed. "I'm _in_ love with you. Have been for a long time." Cas closed his eyes and tears fell down the bridge of his nose and bloody temple; he bit his lower lip to try and stop it from trembling. "I'm sorry I didn't say it before. I was scared. Everyone I love always has a way of ending up dead. And I knew if I said it and you died…again," the hunter chuckled sadly, "that I wouldn't be able to go on. Back when Jack was born…" Dean clenched his jaw and closed his eyes. "I'd never been so lost, Cas. And after you came back… When you weren't in the bunker─ even for a short time, like going on a beer run─ every time, as soon as you walked out the door, it was hard to breathe. I couldn't sleep or eat while you were gone." Dean shook his head and took as deep of a breath as he could manage, his lungs wheezing. _It's almost over_. Dean squeezed the angel's hand.

"Dean, I've loved you ever since I knitted your soul and body back together. Naomi and the other angels were right; the moment I touched you, it was over for me. I fell for you." Dean smiled. The angel moved closer and pulled himself onto the blonde's chest, resting his head in the crook of Dean's neck. Their joined hands settled in the small space between them, never unclasping. Cas's right hand slid across Dean's chest to grasp onto Sam's jacket. Two of the most important people in Dean's life rested on him. He wouldn't have it any other way.

Silence enveloped them as they held each other. The pair were both so weak. Dean could barely take in half a lungful of air and Cas was starting to feel disoriented. For a few moments, all was still.

"Do you think I'll go to Heaven? After all the bad I've done?" Cas's voice broke through the silence. "What if I end up in Hell?"

"You deserve Heaven. You done too much good to not end up in Heaven. And if you end up in Hell, I'll be raising it in Heaven till you get back," he whispered and squeezed the angel's hand.

"What if I don't end up anywhere? What if I just disappear?" That was Dean's biggest fear. He didn't want to think about it, and he didn't have an answer. Instead he hugged Cas tighter and placed a fervent kiss to the angel's forehead. He didn't want to think about living without his angel again. It was too painfully scary.

Dean looked down at his angel just in time to see Cas's grasp on Sam's jacket loosen, hand slowly sliding down his brother's arm, body stilling. "Cas?" he whispered. When his angel didn't respond Dean let out a choked sob. He unclasped his right hand from Cas's grasp and maneuvered his arm under his lifeless body, sliding his hand up to rest on the angel's back.

He was alone. The hunter placed a tender kiss to Cas's forehead and warm tears slid down his cheek, splashing onto his angel's hair.

Dean laid back and turned his face upward, mustering up all his remaining energy and yelled. "You _will_ save him! Do you hear me, Chuck?! You will fucking save him! He deserves to be in Heaven! Do you hear me, you son of a bitch?!" He closed his eyes and shook his head in anguish, feeling the cool dirt against the back of his scalp. "Please," he whispered. "Please save him. I need him. I… I love him. _Please_," he begged, blinking the tears from his eyes.

He sensed the last dregs of his life slowly evaporating. He felt cold and lightheaded, and he could feel his lungs filling up with fluid. He didn't have much time left. All he had to do was let go.

As he was taking his last few breaths, he lifted his head one last time, placing a kiss on Sammy's head and on Cas's forehead. He laid his head back for the final time against to cool dirt and closed his eyes, allowing darkness to envelop his consciousness.

**************************

Then… there was light. A bright white so brilliant that it veiled his surroundings. He squinted and raised his hand to block out the radiance. Gradually his eyes adjusted, the edges of his vision cleared slowly revealing a house with a white picket fence. It was two-story with black shutters and aged red bricks that covered the lower two feet of the ground floor, wrapping around the side towards the back. The front door was teal with light-colored brass finishings.

_Was this his heaven?_

Dean's heart started beating quickly. He unlatched the gate and walked up the stone path towards the front door. He climbed up the two stone steps and reached for the doorknob… only for his hand to still in midair. His heart was beating so fast. Dean was scared of what laid behind the door. Would Sammy be there? Mom and Dad?... Cas? He clenched his eyes shut and swallowed down the lump in his throat.

He took a steadying breath and wrapped his fingers around the knob, stepping inside. Before he could take in his surroundings, a mop of brown hair popped around the archway leading into, what Dean assumed was, the kitchen.

"Dean?" Sam's voice was a balm on his frayed nerves. Before he could say anything, Sam took three giant steps and wrapped Dean in a bear hug.

"Woah, easy tiger," Dean beamed, a smile lit his face. "It's good to see you little brother." He pulled away to look at his brother's face. Both men had tears in their eyes.

"I told you I'd wait for you," Sam muttered. Dean nodded, clapping his younger brother on the shoulder. He looked his younger brother over. Sam was whole again. And he looked younger. The lines that once creased his forehead and the corners of his eyes were gone. His hair still looked the same. _Of course_.

"You look good, Sammy," Dean mused, nudging at his younger brother's chin. Sam swatted his hand away playfully.

"You do too," Sam said, grabbing Dean's shoulders and spinning him around to face the mirror that was hanging above a small table on one of the walls in the foyer. Dean's eyes widened. He brought his hands to his face, touching his smooth skin. He looked like he couldn't be more than thirty.

"Holy shit," Dean said so eloquently. "I look amazing!" His eyes flicked over to his brother's face reflected in the mirror. Sam crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow when his older brother winked at him. It never got old seeing his little brother rolling his eyes.

Before he could prod at Sam further Dean's eyes flitted over to a smiling figure he hadn't noticed until just then.

He turned around in time to see a beautiful curly-haired blonde sidling up next to Sam. She slipped her hand into his younger brother's and laced their fingers together.

"Hi, Dean."

"Jess?" She nodded. Dean couldn't believe it. How long had it been? Fifteen years?

"Pick your jaw up off the floor before you catch flies and come give me a hug," she teased. Dean shook his head to clear his thoughts. He took a step forward and embraced her. She giggled before pulling back. He leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek.

"It's good to see you Jess. I gotta tell ya, you are still way out of my brother's league." Dean looked over at his younger brother and winked.

"Har, har," Sam pouted. Dean and Jess laughed, parting to stand where they had been before. Jess threaded her fingers through Sam's. "Jerk," he grumbled.

Dean clapped his brother on the shoulder, smiling like a hyena. "Bitch." They looked at each other again before pulling one another in for a fierce hug. They clung to each other like their lives depended on it. "God I'm glad you're okay, Sammy," Dean muttered.

"Yeah," Sam cleared his throat, then sniffled.

"Have you, uh… have you seen anyone else?" Dean gently probed.

"Yeah, you actually have a visitor in the kitchen." Dean's heart leapt into his throat. He swallowed hard and nodded. "Well, we'll get out of your hair." Dean's eyes flicked from the kitchen to his brother and Jess.

“You're leaving?" he blurted frantically. He'd just gotten to see his brother, now he was leaving again? It must've shown on his face, because Sam lightly grabbed his shoulder.

"We'll be back. We live right next door," Sam said, trying to appease his brother.

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath, nodding. Good.

_...Wait._

"You live next door? Do we share a heaven?" Sam and Jess smiled.

"Yeah. Yeah, we do. Apparently it happens a lot with married couples." Dean blanched but Sam, unfazed, continued, "Only a handful of non-couples share heavens. The Wright brothers, the Bronte sisters, King David and Jonathan─ although they may actually be a couple─"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Dean cut him off. This was a lot to take in. He sighed; it didn't matter anyway. What mattered was that he'd get to see Sammy every day. A smile spread across his face in excitement. This was the life he'd always wanted Sam to have. Now he actually got to be a part of it and see his little brother happy, the way it should've been.

"Dinner tonight?" Dean blurted. A blush raised across his cheeks. He cleared his throat, "Uh, I mean, I wanna get to know my sister-in-law better. Plus, I gotta share embarrassing stories about you with Jess," he said conspiratorially. 

"Dinner it is," she paused looking at Sam. Her loving smile quickly turned to a smirk, "And of course I want to hear those embarrassing stories!" Sam groaned, which made Jess and Dean chuckle.

"I might be rethinking this whole shared-heaven thing," Sam grumbled. But there was no real heat behind it. Jess grabbed the younger man around the waist and lead him out of the front door with promises of catching up.

When the door shut behind him all was quiet. _Someone is waiting in the kitchen_. Dean' heart kicked into gear again. His heart was beating so hard, he could feel it pounding through every cell in his body. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply for what must've been the hundredth time, swallowing down his nerves.

Dean walked towards the kitchen, heart beating loudly in his ears, and turned the corner. His heart immediately lurched and dropped into his stomach, despair filling every fiber of his being.

"Chuck," Dean spat. If looks could kill Chuck would be dead a quintillion times over, even if he was God.

"Son."

"_Don't_ call me that! Where were you?! Huh? You left. AGAIN! The world almost ended, again, and you were nowhere to be seen!" Dean seethed.

"I was right where I was supposed to be," Chuck said calmly. Dean balked.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" the man bristled, crossing his arms.

"Exactly what I meant." Dean was fuming mad. Chuck had the audacity to pretend that he did nothing wrong. He abandoned all of humanity! Again! That son of a bitch.

"Dean, I am God. And as God I Am omnipotent. Before I created everything, I knew you and I'd end up sitting here at this exact moment." That gave Dean pause. "Take a seat." Before he could blink, Dean was sitting on a bar stool across the kitchen island from Chuck with no idea how he'd gotten there.

_Mojo_

Chuck handed Dean an opened bottle of beer. "I created you for a reason."

"Yeah, Michael's Sword, got it," Dean said petulantly, bringing his beer to his lips and taking a long pull of lager.

"Yes, but not for the reason you think." Chuck paused gathering his thoughts. "I knew my angels would lose their way. Humans… you were my greatest creation. I told the angels to love you. I put you above them.

"I knew before I created humans that humanity would be flawed, that they would fail. But just because something has been broken, doesn't make it any less beautiful, less valuable.

"This story is about redemption. Not only of humanity, but also the redemption for all of my creations. My angels," Dean had never been more confused in his entire life.

"Jesus was the one who redeemed humanity," the hunter supplied.

"Yes. He was fully God and fully man," Chuck said, hoping Dean would connect the dots. When silence stretched on, Chuck continued. "Humanity needed God in human form, to walk with them, to lead them, to experience everything that they felt. But angels… they needed someone fully human─ _a righteous man_─ to look to. They needed someone to show them what humanity was really like." Some of the pieces were sliding into place for Dean.

"I made humanity in my image. I gave humans pieces of myself, same characteristics. You are my creations and I wanted you to be like me, a reflection.

"When I created angels, I knew that they too would lose sight of what was really important. And just like humanity needed redeeming by the divine, the divine likewise needed redeeming by humanity. They needed you." Dean sat unblinking, trying to gather his wits. He was dumbfounded. _He_ was created to redeem the angels?

Chuck sighed sadly. "If my angels couldn't fully love humanity─ the ones I gave pieces of myself to─ then they couldn't fully love me."

"So what, Michael possessing me was the cherry on top?" Dean asked sarcastically, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Yes," Chuck said simply. Dean was taken aback. He was not expecting that. "For angels to understand humanity and for humanity to understand the divine, a righteous man needed to meld with─"

"You mean _possess_," Dean cut in.

"─one another. Fully human, fully divine," Chuck continued unfazed. The hunter sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. This was all too much. Dean stood abruptly and paced the length of the island, trying to relieve some of the pent-up anger that was bubbling in his gut.

"Why me? Why did you need to make my life so hard? My life was _hell_. I mean, you _literally_ sent me to Hell and back! And I was a demon once!"

"And can you honestly say you would've wanted a different life? Can you imagine yourself as a mechanic or businessman? And actually being happy?" Dean thought about it and, no, he couldn't imagine living the white picket fence life. He tried it once and he felt unfulfilled. He had this innateness that called him to help people─ to save people. But he also had a deep-seeded sense of adventure. Even if he had been a fireman, police officer, or _whatever_─ it all seemed dull in comparison to being a hunter.

Dean sighed and scratched his brow. "Fine, but why Hell?"

"We'll get to that in a minute," Dean rolled his eyes.

"Well if I was meant to redeem the angels it doesn't look like I succeeded. Those dicks with wings hated me until the very end." Dean felt bad for a split second calling the angels dicks to Chuck's face. But Chuck didn't seem affected by it.

"That's where you're wrong. When you killed The Entity, all the angels who had ever died were 'raised from the dead' so to speak and─" Dean stopped his pacing and whipped around to face Chuck.

"Even Lucifer and Michael?" the hunter cut in, panicking.

"No. Jack destroyed both of them completely─ Lucifer, when Nick tried to bring him back from The Empty and Michael, when he was in the bunker." Sadness laced Chuck's voice, but Dean relaxed marginally. There was no way he wanted to go back to earth to fight Lucifer or Michael… again.

"When the angels heard from me, firsthand, about who saved them and the purpose behind it all, they changed their tune. Even smarmy Zachariah." _Wow_. Now that was something. The pair hated each other. In fact, Dean almost hated ol' Zach more than Lucifer and Michael combined.

"Well, they're all still dicks with wings," the man said as he took another swig of his beer, lager swirling over his tongue. He had had a shit time dealing with angels over the last decade. They always caused more trouble in his life. Honestly angels were just as _tolerable_ as demons in his mind.

"All of them?" Chuck asked, eyes catching something over Dean's shoulder.

"Hello, Dean," came a gravelly voice from behind the hunter.

Dean's heart lurched in his chest. _It can't be_. He snapped around, beer bottle slipping from his hand.

"Cas?" The man's breath hitched, eyes pricking. The angel─ _his_ angel─ only nodded in assent. He saw tears forming in those baby blues. Dean released a shuddering breath he was holding. Without a thought, Dean moved towards Cas, wrapping him in a fierce hug. The angel's fingers came up around the hunter's back to tangle in the man's flannel, forehead coming to rest in the crook of the man's neck. Dean could feel warm tears kissing his skin. Both clung to each other like a drowning man clinging to his last breath. They took a few seconds to just breathe each other in. The hunter's right hand carded through Cas's hair, fingers curling around the hair at the base of the angel's neck. Holding Cas was the only thing grounding him.

Dean pulled away to look at Cas, cupping the angel's face with trembling hands. His angel had tears slowly running down his cheeks. Dean's eyes and hands skimmed over the angel's form, looking him over for injuries. But he had none, he was whole again. And he too looked younger.

"Is it really you? Are you really here?" Dean whispered.

Cas's lip began to tremble and all he could manage to do was to nod. Dean exhaled a shaky breath, bringing his forehead to rest against his angel's, closing his eyes. It didn't seem real. Cas was here. Really here.

Dean brought his lips to Cas's temple and kissed firmly. The angel closed his eyes as his right hand untangled from the hunter's shirt, coming around to rest on top of Dean's beating heart. Neither wanted it to end, but the gentle _thunk_ of a glass bottle landing on a hard surface broke their trance.

Cas pulled away and his eyes flitted to the being behind Dean. The hunter took half a step back, left hand sliding down Cas's arm to his hand, lacing their fingers together. Dean was scared that if he wasn't touching the angel somehow that he'd disappear. That he might wake up from this dream.

"Castiel. Son."

"Father," the angel murmured, wiping away the tears that trailed down his cheeks. His greeting was filled with apprehension. Cas didn't know why he was there with Dean and his Father. Too many scenarios swirled through his mind. Dean, as if he could read Cas's mind, squeezed his hand in assurance. That small act helped abate some of Cas's worry.

"Take a seat you two, we have a lot to talk about," Chuck said, scooting two bar stools out for them with his mojo. The couple took timid steps toward the chairs, still steadfastly clutching to each other's hand.

The pair slid into the open chairs. When they were seated Chuck rested his palms on the island's marble countertop.

"Your beer," Chuck said coolly, using his mojo again to slide Dean's beer across the island, making it come to rest in front of the man. Dean's eyebrows creased. Thinking back, he never did hear the shatter of glass after he dropped his bottle, too caught up in the fact that his angel was standing in front of him. The hunter used his free hand to grab his beer, bringing it to his lips and taking a long pull to numb the pit of worry that still rested in his stomach.

"Castiel, would you like something to drink? A beer maybe?" His Father asked. The angel nodded.

"A beer."

"Good choice." Chuck walked to the fridge and pulled out a bottle, twisting the cap off before walking back to the island and sliding it to his son. "It's the best beer in existence. It'll never go flat and it'll always stay cold─ even if you leave it out all night. I brewed it myself," he smiled proudly. "I'm thinking of calling it the Holy Gr-Ale…" Chuck looked at them expectantly. "Get it? Holy Gr-_ALE_?" The couple just stared at him, the joke falling flat. "Never mind," Chuck waved it off, "dad joke. So," he said clapping his hands together, "where were we?"

"Dicks with wings," Dean supplied. Cas looked at the hunter, the man at least had the decency to look a little ashamed. Dean cleared his throat. "Not you," he said, squeezing Cas's hand. The angel seemed appeased by that.

"Right, '_dicks with wings_'," Chuck echoed. "Let me catch you up Castiel." His Father reached across the island and pressed two fingers to the angel's forehead. Cas's eyes fluttered shut and an ethereal light briefly seeped through his eyelids. When Chuck pulled away and the angel's eyes slowly opened, he looked at Dean with his mouth hanging open. He was speechless.

"Dean," Cas began.

"Yeah," he huffed. Dean took his eyes off of his angel and looked down at his beer bottle like it was the most interesting thing in the entire world. He twirled the bottle on the marble in his free hand. The angel didn't know what to say. Instead of trying to find the right words, he settled on squeezing the hunter’s hand.

"So, Dean, you asked '_why hell?_" The man tore his eyes away from his beer bottle and glanced up at Chuck. "The answer is sitting right next to you." Castiel and Dean glanced at each other before looking back at Chuck. "I sent Castiel to save you. I needed him to be the one to save you... You see, when I created him, I made him differently than all the other angels."

Cas looked down at the countertop, thinking. Did he feel like he was different? He flicked through his memories, examining them with a new perspective. Comparing himself to his brethren, yes, he was different. Deep down he had always known. That he never really felt like he belonged.

Dean studied his angel. And, yeah, if he had to think about it, he _had_ thought that the little guy was just like all the other angels at first. But the more the hunter got to know him, the more he had noticed how different his angel was. Cas seemed to almost have this innocence about him, like he hadn't been jaded.

"I created Castiel to be a warrior and I gave him his very own garrison to command. I created commanders to fight. Rarely did they have the opportunity to interact with humans, always too busy fighting." He took a sip of His beer. "My plan was for Castiel to mostly observe humans from afar, only allowing a few interactions," he paused, "that is until I commanded Joshua to send word for Castiel's garrison to save you, Dean. I knew that as you grew to know my son that you'd see how different he was." It was all starting to click into place. "My son taught you that not all angels were bad." Dean chewed on his bottom lip letting everything sink in. "And every time Castiel was injured or died, yo─"

"Yeah, real dick move by the way," Dean interjected.

"Yes, but each time I brought him back, you believed more and more that he was worth saving…" Of course Cas was worth saving! He had done so much for the brothers for the 11 years he'd known them. The angel gave up everything for them, _for him_. "Without grace, angels are just like humans. And just like humans, they deserved to be redeemed."

The trio sat in silence. There was so much information to process. Dean still had so many questions and those questions might lead to even more questions. It was like opening Pandora's Box. And he wasn't sure he wanted to know some of the answers yet. He only really cared about one question and he was terrified of the answer. His stomach twisted under his ribs and his heart pounded against his chest achingly. But he needed to know. He pried his eyes away from the beer bottle and looked at his angel. "What about Cas?" he asked Chuck without taking his eyes off his angel. Was this goodbye? Would he lose Cas forever? Would─

"That's up to Castiel, " Chuck spoke calmly. The couple’s heads both flicked up to Chuck, mouths hanging open.

"Father?" the angel asked carefully. Chuck smiled at his son.

"You get to choose where you go from here, son. You have two choices. You can take back your Grace," Chuck explained, pulling out the very vial that Castiel had hidden his Grace in back on earth for safe keeping. The Grace wisped delicately around itself within its glass confines, glowing a seraphic white. "You'd be an angel again and I'd put you in charge of _all_ of Heaven's garrisons. I'd also give you your wings back." Dean sucked in a breath as Chuck set the glowing vial down in front of Cas. The angel grabbed it reverently and rolled the glass around in his hand. "Or… you can become human." Dean's heart lurched in his chest and cold dread settled in his bones. He ached because he knew what he had to do. His eyes pricked with tears. He swallowed the dull pain that knotted his throat.

"Did you hear that, Cas?" Dean asked, voice watery. "You'll be in charge of all of Heaven's garrisons. Th-that's amazing, man. And you get your wings back." Dean's heart was crumbling. He released Cas's hand and instead clasped him on the shoulder, looking down at his beer bottle; his, now, empty clammy palm felt the cool air caress the newly exposed skin. He missed the look of hurt that creased Cas's face. He couldn't look at his angel─ _the_ angel. It hurt too much.

Cas still thumbed at the vial in his hand. "Father, if I became an angel again… would I be able to visit Sam and Dean?" the angel asked. The hunter's heart sank. The angel didn't say _visit Dean_. It was now _Sam and Dean_. Cas had made up his mind. He was going to leave the hunter.

His Father set His beer down. "Some," Chuck offered. "But you'd be commanding all the garrisons in Heaven. That would take up most of your time."

"Then I choose Dean," Cas said promptly. Dean's head shot up in time to see Castiel set his vial of Grace down on the white marble countertop. He looked up at his Father, then to Dean.

"Cas, man, you don't know what you're doing! This is what you've wanted for a long time, a way to get on Heaven's good side, remember? You can't give that up. Not for me. Please, man. I'm not worth it," he pleaded. Sadness shrouded Cas's face as he looked down at his lap, a frown tugging at his lips.

"Do you not want me here, Dean?" the angel whispered dolefully.

"Of course I want you here, Cas! But y─"

"Then I choose you," Cas cut him off, looking up to meet the hunter's eyes. The angel could see tears in Dean's mossy-green eyes.

"Cas─ "

"Dean, I have followed orders my entire existence… until I met you. You helped me see what freewill really is," the angel pushed. "I've become my own being, capable of making my own choices. And it's my choice… to choose you," Castiel finished earnestly.

"I'm not worth it, Cas," the hunter whispered, closing his eyes in shame; he had made the angel fall.

The angel stood from his stool and cupped Dean's face, forcing the man to look him in the eyes. Even without his Grace, Cas knew exactly what Dean was feeling, and it just wouldn't do.

"You are the _righteous man_, Dean. You are good. You are worth it to me." The hunter closed his eyes, letting Cas see the tears soaking his eyelashes. How could Dean let the angel give everything up for him?

"Cas─"

"If you love me, let me stay." Dean's eyes fluttered open. His breath caught in his throat. Cas wanted to stay with him. He wasn't abandoning Dean. He swallowed the ache in his throat and looked Cas in the eyes, bringing his hand up to cup the angel's.

"Are you sure?" Dean breathed.

"More than anything," Cas promised. The hunter released a shaky breath and tears slipped down his cheeks. Cas was quick to thumb them away. Dean finally felt like something had unknotted in his chest, allowing him to really breathe for the first time in a long while. For the first time in years he felt hope. He smiled and turned his face, kissing the angel's palm.

"Okay," Dean muttered, finally agreeing.

"Okay?" Cas asked.

"Yes," the man vowed softly, smiling into Cas's palm. The angel─ _his angel_─ pulled him up off the stool and into a fierce hug. Both choked out a relieved, wet chuckle. It was real. Cas was staying with Dean. They clung to each other like ivy clinging to a trellis.

"So you've chosen?" Chuck inquired. Cas pulled away from his hunter to look at his Father.

"Yes, Father," he couldn't help the smile that lit up his face. Dean looked down at his angel and smiled right back. He used his free hand to pinch his leg because it still didn't seem real and─ _ow_─ it was.

"I figured as much," Chuck smirked. "If you change your mind just pray to Me. I'll hold onto your Grace, keep it safe," his Father added. Castiel untangled himself from his hunter and walked around the island to his Father, embracing Him.

"Thank you. Thank you so much, Father," Castiel breathed.

"You deserve it, son, for not abandoning My creations and for loving them." Chuck patted the angel on his back when they separated. "Well," He said, clearing His throat, "I'll let you two get settled." Chuck waved at the couple, heading to the front door. Castiel made his way back to Dean and wrapped an arm around his hunter's waist. Dean pulled him in tightly to his side.

"Hey, Chuck," the hunter called before Chuck reached the door. He stopped and looked back at Dean. "Uh, thank you. Uh, for-for everything. For Cas," he said blushing. Dean extended his hand towards Chuck.

"You're welcome," Chuck smiled warmly, firmly shaking the hunter's hand then releasing it.

“And I know you’ve done so much already but, I was wondering… is there any way Sammy and I can see our parents? If it’s too much, I understand.”

“I think you’ve earned it,” He beamed. Chuck snapped His fingers. “There. Now there’s a door that connects both of your heavens. You can visit them whenever you want.” Dean chuckled in disbelief.

_Fucking Mojo_.

“Chuck, man, that’s─ thank you. So much.”

“You’re welcome,” Chuck responded, reaching for the doorknob before stopping. "Oh, and Dean?"

"Yeah?" Dean raised his eyebrows, Chuck's smile dissolving from His face.

"Don't ever call Me a son of a bitch again," Chuck warned. Dean huffed a laugh. And when the smile didn't return to Chuck's face, the hunter swallowed nervously. Dean rubbed the back of his neck anxiously, rubbing away the pricking of sweat that had just broken out.

"S-sorry," he stammered. Without another word Chuck smirked and walked out the door, letting it gently close behind Him. Dean let out a shaky sigh. 

"You called my Father a '_son of a bitch_'?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, I may have, uh─ you see, when you died, I yelled at Him to save you and it may have slipped out. I blame it on blood loss," Dean sputtered. Cas pursed his lips then snorted at his hunter's babbling. "Shut up," Dean pouted.

The angel turned to face his hunter, wrapping Dean completely in a hug around the waist. He laid his head on his hunter's shoulder and listened to Dean's steady breathing. "So…"

"So," Dean parroted, laying his head on top of Cas's.

"What do we do now?" the angel inquired.

"I don't know, maybe a grand tour of our place?" Dean blushed and bulldozed through the fact that he acknowledged this was _their_ home. "Then maybe we can go to Sammy's? After that, I don't know. What else is there to do in Heaven?"

"Plenty. We can walk the streets of gold, we can see the unicorns, we c─"

"_Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait_. Unicorns are real?!" the man stammered.

"Yes, Dean." Castiel said it in a way that made it seem like it was common knowledge.

"I knew it!" Dean chirped. "I have to tell Sammy! I can't wait to see his stupid face when I tell him." The angel sighed and shook his head against Dean's chest. The brothers still acted like children. He found it quite endearing though.

"Well, we could also go to Heaven's Library?" Cas suggested.

"More books? No thank you." Dean hated studying lore on earth, why would he want to study more? "That might be a you-and-Sammy kinda date. He'll geek out for sure," he chuckled. "Wait… does Sam know you're here?"

"No. Right after I died I appeared in our kitchen." Dean's heart fluttered momentarily at the domesticity of hearing '_our kitchen_'. But then the hunter shook his head free of those thoughts when he remembered his confusion. His brows furrowed.

"But you died before me. Shouldn't you have been here before me?" Cas raised his head to look Dean in the eyes.

"Time works differently in heaven. Time is not linear here. There are several books in the library that explain in detail─"

"Nope. I believe you," Dean interrupted. "I don't want to read anything for at least another century." That gave him pause. It sounded hyperbolic at first, but realizing that he did have forever put a smile on his face. He would get to spend forever with Cas and Sammy. When Dean emerged from his musings, he noticed Cas had a dopey smile on his face and he was pretty sure he was wearing one that matched.

"A century it is then," Cas agreed, resting his forehead in the crook of Dean's neck. He breathed the hunter in again. He didn't think he would ever get tired of doing that.

Dean tilted his head and placed a gentle kiss on the Cas's temple. "I love you, angel," the hunter whispered. Cas squeezed him tight and smiled against Dean's neck.

"I know," the angel breathed, causing Dean to guffaw. He couldn't believe his angel had just Han Solo'd him. He was glad for the distraction though, because the mood was getting a little too heavy for his taste. Cas knew him too well. He kissed Cas on the forehead again before breaking away. His angel looked him in the eyes and with all sincerity. "I love you," Cas murmured. Dean's face and neck flushed a beautiful pink. The angel's mood turned solemn. "Do you think Jack will be okay without us?" Dean sighed; it had crossed his mind too.

"Yeah. He's in good hands with Jody and Donna. Without his grace he's just a normal kid." Cas raised his eyebrow. "Ok, _fairly_ normal. He'll have a plain, boring, vanilla life with them." It was bittersweet. They both knew there'd be a day where they would be reunited again, they just didn't know when. And for now, that thought gave them peace .

The hunter's hand slid from Cas's back down his arms before he laced his hand with his angel's. "Let's go see Sammy. We're supposed to do dinner later." A huge, gummy grin broke across the angel's face.

"I'll be able to taste food," he said excitedly. "Can we have burgers? And I would like to try hotdogs. And I miss PB & Js. And I want to try pie─"

"Hey, slow down," the hunter chuckled. "I don't think we can fit that all into one meal." Cas's smile faded as he pouted, but Dean squeezed his hand making him look up at the hunter. "It's okay, angel, we literally have all eternity." Cas's smile returned to his face tenfold.

"Okay," Cas sighed in contentment. 

"Okay," Dean smiled. "C'mon. Let's go tell Sammy you're home." _Home_. Dean liked the sound of that.

The couple walked out the door of their home, hand in hand, starting their very own forever.


End file.
